Kneeling before Him...
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Tuesday, December 09, 2003
Yesterday I was so angry. If there is one thing I cannot stand it is being talked down too. I am an intelligent female with thoughts and opinions of my own and I am completely capable of expressing them without degrading anyone. I went out with some friends because being at home alone was depressing me. We were sitting around talking about dating when one of the divorced men in the group, Robert, said that he couldn't understand why all the women he dated were looking for 'father figures'. I asked what he meant by that and he said 'women that need help in making the simplest decisions, you know, the ones that want you to approve of everything they do. I have a daughter and do not need to raise another child. I prefer strong women.'
I asked if he thought that women who need a loving supportive relationship were weak and he said yes. Everyone else had pretty much fallen quiet. Mac and I do not make a big deal out of His position in my life. I don't refer to Him as Master, or announce I am His submissive, but at the very least most of my female friends are aware of the dynamic that passes between U/us and realise that I will defer to Mac before making a decision so all were watching this exchange in interest.
I am always very careful when choosing the words I use in a discussion. Mac often says it's like being savaged by a slaughtered lamb. I told Robert that in my opinion, women that need a loving relationship are no weaker or stronger than anyone else, they just function best that way.
Robert said 'Ok Sarah.' 'If you say so Sarah.' 'I must be wrong, Sarah.' 'You are right Sarah.' And that's when I started to lose my temper. I told Robert that I would like to have an intelligent conversation about this, but that was obviously impossible and I started talking to someone else. Ten minutes later when I got up to go to the bar, Robert followed. He said he was sorry, that it was just that I had attacked him with my opinion and that he just didn't want to argue with me so he had agreed. I told him that there was no attack, I offered my opinion and hoped it would spark a conversation but his treating me like a child had precluded that. He said that he would leave me alone as I was obviously angry. I ordered my drink and when I turned back to him, he was gone.
When I went back over to our friends I overheard Robert telling them that I had told him to take a hike and that I had treated him like a child. And that's when I really got angry. I pointed out that it was he who had started saying 'ok Sarah, yes Sarah, you are right Sarah' and that he had been the one to suggest leaving me alone, I just hadn't disagreed with him.
Robert announced that he was tired and left quickly and I was furious. He didn't even have the balls to admit the truth. He made me feel inadequate, not because he feels submissive women are weak, but because he treated me like I didn't count. To me having my opinion dismissed like that and then being deceitful to our friends is much more of a weakness than admitting you need to lean on someone to make the world right for you.
I think it's fair enough that Robert does not want to date women that he feels depend on him too much. It's great that he understands that he can't handle that. I just think it is a shame that he sees this trait as a weakness and I was hoping to point out that to another man it could be a delicious plus to the relationship. I guess you can't make someone see the woods through the trees if they don't want to look.
So what did I do in my anger? I went home and rang Emma and she listened to me rant and whine then she suggested we go out for some fun. Mac doesn't mind if Emma and I are a little wicked together, so long as we share the details with Him and as long as we don't put ourselves into any danger. Emma knew this horrible little dive of a bar where we could go and misbehave as much as we wanted.
Emma and I look kind of amazing together. She is fair and blonde, I am olive skinned and brunette. We are practically the same size in height and in weight, although I am slightly curvier than she is. We both wore short black skirts with stockings and high heels and I had on a tight sleeveless top with a black lace over-shirt, Emma had on a tight red shirt that showed off her cleavage and gosh she looked yummy.
We had a great time flirting with a heap of different men and playing at being coy little sluts. Eventually Emma singled one guy out and I mainly watched while she teased and cajoled and convinced him the offer she was making was for real. We eventually got the guy into the alley behind the bar and while he was still protesting the lack of privacy Emma freed his cock from his pants and he got really quiet. She bent over to look at his penis up close while she was stroking it and she said 'Mmmm, pretty cock,' while glancing wickedly at me. I had to bite my lip so that I didn't break down in a fit of giggles. She told me to come look and I knelt and started to stroke him too. Emma got to her knees on the other side of his cock and we started to kiss him and then my tongue touched hers and I tried to kiss her around his cock. All I wanted was her tongue in my mouth. We watched each other kiss and lick and stroke his cock and balls and he was more just a toy we were playing with than a man we were pleasuring but that didn't stop him from coming pretty quickly. He came on Emma's face and shirt and we both giggled when he did.
Emma and I stood up and I licked at the semen on her cheek and slid my tongue into her mouth and once I started kissing her I didn't want to stop. I murmured to Emma that we should go home and the guy cleared his throat and we both looked at him a little startled. I had forgotten he was there. He asked if he could come with us and Emma said no. He said he would pay and Emma and I burst out laughing. We told him thankyou but no and we walked out to the road and grabbed a cab.
Emma spent the night here last night and she has just borrowed some of my clothes for work.
It's not the first time Emma and I have used a guy as a toy to enhance our own excitement, but it was the first time we did it without Mac there. I have a feeling that when Mac gets home from His trip, Emma and I will be told to show Him exactly how we did it.
I can hardly wait.