Kneeling before Him...
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Friday, April 23, 2004
When Mac left yesterday I was a little frustrated. Not because the sex isn't great because, my God it has been dirty and nasty and I have been very submissive and the orgasms have been deep and satisfying. I was frustrated because after the sex Mac said that He had to go and jumped into the shower and was racing out the door while still getting dressed. Same as the day before. The day before that He hung around for a little while but the discussion was about needing a cupboard for His study. There seemed to me to be a pattern happening. I was getting sex, but very little affection.
So I spent the day fretting over it. Well, I spent a few days fretting over it. It bothered me. I didn't know how to bring it up with Him. I didn't know how to say, "I want more affection." I hoped it would just happen and it probably would have just happened but I didn't want to wait. Patience is a virtue. I have never claimed to be virtuous.
In the end, I admitted to Him that I had something to say and was probably going to completely stuff it up. He was listening. W/we ended up in a conversation where I told Him I wanted more affection from Him. He asked if I was saying that He was just using me for sex. I wasn't saying that. Heck, use me for the sex. Use me lots for sex! I really don't mind but can't I have the affection too?
He gave it some thought.
'S'pose.' He said. I smacked Him. 'WHAT?' He exclaimed.
'MEN!' I sighed.
He laughed and asked me how many times do I think that conversation was played out all over the world ending in MEN!
'Well!' I said in my well thought out defence.
'First you want fucking. Then you don't JUST want fucking.' He said again.
I gave up. I told Him I gave up.
'No you don't,' He said. 'I should be so lucky!'
'Yes I do,' I said. 'From now on forget about the love bullshit, the fucking will do.'
He grinned at me and told me that if He didn't eat He was going to faint. (He is never far from starvation.) Then He wouldn't even be good for the fucking.
I dismissed Him, told Him I was finished with Him and said 'shoo.' He laughed at me and took my hand and told me I was gorgeous. I laughed too. W/we went to eat.
And the fucking has really been spectacular. Mac is so wicked that at times He still takes my breath away and shocks me into orgasm.
Yesterday He straddled me and painted my lips and nipples red again with the lipstick that seems to have found a home in my bedside drawer. He sat with His cock resting between my tits and reached behind Him to slide His fingers along my pussy. He told me that I was hot and wet and brought His finger to my mouth and smeared my juices along the lipstick wiping it across my cheeks. I knew I must have looked like a used whore.
He leaned forward and kissed me, a hard bruising kiss, His tongue thrusting into my mouth. I whimpered and put my hands on His shoulders and He pushed them away and pinned them open on the bed. He told me not to move my arms again. I kept them there. He kissed me again. Then He slapped me.
He slapped me and called me a whore. He slapped me and called me a slut. He slapped me and called me a cock hungry cunt. He slapped me and asked me if I wanted His come. I was whimpering, fighting with myself to keep my arms out on the bed, rubbing my thighs together to quell the throbbing in my clitoris. He moved His cock up to my mouth and thrust Himself inside me. He pulled His cock from my mouth and slapped me again and told this bitch that I wasn't to swallow. I tried to say yes and He slapped me again and told me to shut up. He thrust into me again and again then He withdrew and jerked Himself into my open mouth, filling it with His semen.
He slid His body down mine so that He was laying over me and He licked my lips. He told me that He wanted me to keep His semen hot inside my mouth until He was ready to fuck my mouth again. He shifted to kneel between my legs. He demanded that I open my mouth and He dipped two fingers into His come and scooped it from me. He took the fingers to my pussy and He smeared His semen all along me, mixing it into my juices. Then He spat on His fingers and mixed that into me as well. I couldn't speak. I couldn't make a noise without risking swallowing or choking. I wasn't allowed to move my hands. All I could do was watch Him. He moved so that He was lying between my legs and He caressed me with His unshaven chin and jaw, grazing my sensitive skin. I arched my back, pulling myself away from Him the best I could, then pushed my hips back up to meet the delicious pain again. His teeth grazed my clitoris and I screamed in my mind, grinding myself into Him even more. He lifted my legs onto His shoulders and placed His tongue against my ass and licked in one long slow line from my ass to my clitoris and I came. He held me around my hips while I bucked and writhed, His tongue applying pressure to my clitoris throughout the orgasm until I knew I couldn't stand it for a second longer, I was going to move my arms and push Him away and I was going to swallow and I was going to call Him a name or two, then He stopped. I relaxed against the bed in relief. That just felt too damn good.
He straddled my chest again and told me to open my mouth. His cock was hard and He pushed it between my lips into the hot wetness of His own semen. It oozed out around His cock while He fucked my mouth. W/we were both aware of it spilling from my lips. He came quickly, filling me with fresh semen. He hadn't told me if I could swallow or not so I held it in my mouth again. When He was finished He moved back down to lie on my body again. He kissed my lips and looked at me, hesitating a moment or two before saying 'swallow'. I did and I wrapped my arms around Him. He laughed and told me that He hadn't said I could move my arms but I didn't care. I kissed Him.
He sighed and said He had to go and I sighed and let Him go, but I swear if He had stayed home I would have done anything, anything at all for Him yesterday. I would have fucked Him constantly and all day. I would have done anything to please Him. I was in a completely and utterly submissive state and I would even have been completely happy just to spend the day at His feet. His ownership on me was strong right up until He walked out the door.
This morning W/we woke and He told me He needed to go to a meeting that was mixed up yesterday, but that He would be home within hours and He expected lots of sex. I wrapped my arms around His neck and kissed Him and told Him I would be ready. He smiled at me and said something that meant even more than I love you. But I shan't tell what it was because He would blush.
Sometimes it can be as simple as asking for what I want.
He wants me to have that too.