Because it is the weekend, and because Mac and I have some free time to spend together and because I want to spend it naked in His arms, here is a little something different from the pen (or keyboard) of Mac.


"The English Football Association reported last night that owing to the continued so called 'McBroden phenomenon', all Welsh people of that name have been offered contracts to watch all England games on television and to try to influence goal-scoring with their watching habits.

It has been found over the years that certain people of this name can watch hour after hour of England games, and prompt England goals at will merely by glancing away from the screen for brief moments. Similarly, visits to kitchens to put on kettles, visits to bathrooms, and answering the front door to impromptu visitors all have the same effect.

Since the 1966 World Cup, when one Welshman of this name claimed the distinction during the final of managing to be present at all Germany's goals and none of England's, the phenomenon has been studied. Analysis shows that of the England goals scored in matches watched by this individual since 1966, only 23% were scored while he was actually in the room. Of these, almost one third were scored while he was looking away, scrabbling behind the sofa looking for toffees, or momentarily snoozing.

In the same period the McBroden family's attention was riveted upon the screen for more than 85% of opposition goals...and 100% of those scored by Germany. (A particular triumph was the famous night when England defeated Germany 5-1 during a world cup qualifier. Mr McBroden was the only male at the Venue Cinema Complex that night, having been somehow prevailed upon to attend some eminently forgettable chic-flick girlie film. The authorities are now convinced that had he not managed to achieve this feat, England would have been unceremoniously dumped from the competition)

Yesterday during the Swiss game Mr McBroden visited the bathroom for 1 minute 40 seconds (1-0), the kitchen for one and a half minutes to stock up on lemon tea (2-0) and walked to the back of the room once to adjust the air conditioning which resulted in turning his back on the screen (3-0)

By some freak he managed to miss Lampard's goal against France (lemon tea again) and see Beckham's missed penalty. It goes without saying that he suffered with the nation of his father for both the French goals.

Manchester United have expressed interest as well, as it is rumoured that the phenomenon applies to their televised matches. For Germany, read Arsenal."

Perhaps there is only enough blood for either a man's penis or his brain because we don't need men thinking about football during sex!