Kneeling before Him...
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Wednesday, September 22, 2004
I did not realise that yesterday's post would touch so many people. I sometimes forget that a lot of women that read what I have to say identify a part of themselves with me and that when someone tells me I am sick, need help and shouldn't be like I am, some of you feel like it has been said about you too. We don't need help and there are men out there and in our hearts that love us for being who we are. If this is an illness, bugger it; I don't want to be cured. It is the best kind of disease.
As Mac said to me yesterday: 'Baby you are gorgeous and perfect for me and I would not change you one iota except to make you happier. So fuck 'em all.'
Thankyou all for your comments and please always feel free to have your say.
Now I would like to get back to my regular program of passionate and kinky sex that leaves me panting with lustful exhaustion and wanting more even though I can hardly move. In fact I would REALLY like to get back to it. Mac and I haven't had sex in two days. TWO DAYS! This keeps up we will be back at the almost famous three-day semen drought that occurred in January this year.
I can hear you all say that two days without sex is nothing, a mere trifle, a cakewalk and under a normal set of circumstances, I would agree. Two days is nothing. Heck three days isn't even a panic but for goodness sake, I AM OVULATING! I don't just desire fucking, I NEED it, I CRAVE it, I am like a junkie going cold turkey. I NEED TO GET LAID!
I know, I know, I am overreacting here but I am getting desperate. Any moment now I will be peeling paint off the walls with my fingernails. Shortly after that I will be roaming the streets trawling for Alpha Males with hard-ons. This is not something that can be fixed with the toys in the drawer or a truckload of batteries. I need cock. I need semen. I need it in me NOW. I am desperate I tell you, desperate.
This is not Mac's fault, I have been as busy as He has and unfortunately for me, the times when I have been available for wild messy noisy sex, Mac has not and vice versa. Like last night, I came in the door and He was leaving in ten minutes. I pouted at Him and told Him I wanted to be fucked. He sighed. He really just didn't have the time. When He was leaving He kissed me and pulled me close, pressing His groin into mine and I could feel how hard His cock was. As much as His arousal thrilled me, it really didn't help do anything but increase my need. It was like showing a starving man a juicy steak, then taking it away before he could get a bite.
And the slightest little thing sends me into slathering, uncontrollable lust. The scent of His pillow, the sight of His jeans, the unexpected smile when I see Him across the room. I hear Him talking business on the phone and suddenly I am imagining His wicked words falling heavily on my aching skin, His breath tangling its evil way into my mind. It is out of my control. I am out of my control and for the most part, He is clueless, completely oblivious to the fact that at any time I could tear His clothes from His skin and devour Him in a frenzy of need. I can't help it. I can't make it go away. I need to be fucked.
I hope we find time today.