Kneeling before Him...
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Friday, November 26, 2004
The darker and deeper we were exploring has stopped, or at least been put on hold. There is a good reason for that. Mac has only been making it home roughly every second night because of travelling for work. To keep pushing the limits like we were while He is so often away would have been bad for me, very bad for me. We know this from experience so we thought it was sensible not to push it right now. Instead Mac has been holding me very close.
On the nights He has been away, we usually talk on the phone snuggled up in bed until we are ready to sleep and in the mornings I am His wake up call. One day He made me smile because I listened as He got dressed then He took me down to breakfast and told me what He was serving up for Himself. He only said goodbye so He could eat.
When He is here, the lovemaking has been passionately intense. It's almost like we are trying to get inside each other's skin. I am determined to make Him ache for me on those nights alone and He seems determined to make me ache for Him.
He wakes up so contented and warm and sleepy that I am seducing Him while His eyes are still half closed. Of course the seduction can consist of nothing more than my hand over His heart and my lips on His cheek. He complains that He must seem very easy to me. I complain that I can't keep Him hard for more than two orgasms. He keeps telling me that after two He is drained. I think age is catching up with Him.
My favourite morning was the day I half woke Him with kisses and told Him I had been thinking of His hand in my hair and His teeth on my neck and His cock spurting deeply inside me. He rolled me onto my back and entered me and bit my neck and made me come with Him. Then He moved onto His back and pulled me half over Him and drifted back to sleep. I don't think He woke up properly.
So I am feeling very warm, very loved, very soft and very feminine. I am feeling very much His precious girl. I am lapping up the love and affection that He is showering upon me and really I should want nothing more. Right?
Only when it is like this, when the love and affection overwhelms me, I crave to be taken, I crave to be fucked and used and treated like a whore. It is strange because when He is tossing me about and fucking me hard, I want to be held softly. Now that He is holding me softly I want to be fucked hard. It's not that I am dissatisfied with what I have or ungrateful of what He gives me. I am just greedy for it all, all of the time. All ways always.
I guess I am a precious, greedy, loving, lusting, princess whore.
Seems to be a lot to love.
Mac never seems to have trouble with it though.