Kneeling before Him...
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Friday, October 21, 2005
So it's Friday, the day before 'the day', the wedding eve. And how do I feel? Like a little girl who asked for a Barbie doll for Christmas and woke up and found she had gotten the Barbie, and the Dream House, and the convertible, and the stable and the horses and all the other things that now come in Barbie pink.
I have to admit to being a little stunned as well. I am going to be a wife. I am going to be Mac's wife. If you had told me four years ago that this is where He and I would end up I would have told you that you were stark raving mad. I loved Him then. I would fantasise about how it would be if we were together. I would imagine that He would love me like no other man ever had and that I would make Him the happiest man alive. Then I would shake my head at myself because I knew Mac was out of my league. I was just quiet, sweet little Sarah. I would never interest Him.
But He loved me, in His own sweet way. I knew that about Him even back then. He treated me differently, gentler than He treated other people. He always tried to protect me, even when it made little sense to Him. He was looking out for me. So the friendship was strong and I would have made do with that. I would have been happy enough just knowing that I was special to Him. It would have been enough for me.
I am still surprised that Mac wanted me as His at all and now here we are on the edge of making it a forever thing. We both see marriage as a forever thing. As much as people, including us, joke about this being the first marriage, divorce is still considered a dirty word in both our families. We both take our vows seriously. I really can hardly believe that this is happening. We love each other this much.
I can't keep typing. As it is I am crying happy tears. I need to wrap this up and tell you all thank you for all the beautiful well wishes. Mac and I appreciate every one of them. When we raise our glasses to friends that can't be with us, I promise you all that I will be thinking about you.
I will be back after the honeymoon. I should be gone about two weeks. Someone might leave a note here while I am gone, but she won't know much more than the rest of you do. I promise I will remember every detail and I will do my best to tell you all what it was like for me and with any luck we can get Mac to say what it was like for Him.
Take care of each other while we are away.