Kneeling before Him...



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Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Mum woke me at 7am and I sat up slowly and took a few deep breaths. I looked up at her and opened my mouth to speak and I suddenly knew I was going to be sick. I raced into the bathroom and when I was done I brushed my teeth and had a shower before going back out to face my parents and the other people I could hear had arrived. I felt so silly. I have never thrown up because of nerves before.

I came out of the bathroom wearing just my robe with a towel wrapped around my head. Every one asked if I was ok and I said I was fine, just a bad case of butterflies. Mum had some toast ready and I sat down and ate some with jam and drank a nice hot cup of tea and my tummy seemed to be settling just fine. I really did not want to throw up again.

All the girls had arrived ready for the hairdresser and I was just about to go and get changed into a top and skirt when the doorbell rang. My sister said she would get it and I had started towards my bedroom when she yelled that there was a package for me. I yelled back that she should put it with the other gifts when she stunned me with her next words.

"It's from Mac." She said and I swear to god my heart stopped. "You had better come and see."

The toast in my tummy suddenly felt like lead and I couldn't think. I walked to the door in a daze. There was a nice man standing there but I hardly even noticed him. I could only see the long white box tied up with a read bow that he was holding in his arms. I signed for it and I took the box from him and turned around. Everyone was standing there watching me.

"It's from Mac." I said.
"Well open it!" Mum said.

And for a moment, just a split second, I thought that maybe Mac had changed His mind and He wasn't game enough to tell me Himself. I pulled the box open and inside was twelve perfect blood red roses, still with thorns. I knew then that He wasn't going anywhere. The card was sitting in amongst the thorns and I reached in and pulled it out. I didn't care if they scratched me or drew blood. It felt like that's what they were supposed to do.

The card was simple, just a slip of white paper, no embellishments or anything. Mac had written it Himself, I knew that as soon as I saw the writing.

You are Mine. See you at 2pm.

I immediately started crying.

"What is it?" Mum said a little anxiously.
"He loves me, Mum." I managed between gulps of air.

Mum threw her hands up in the air and muttered something about "men" and walked off dabbing at her eyes. And my darling sister took charge and took the flowers off me and steered me down the hall into my bedroom to get changed. I had a good cry while I was in there. Mac has never ever sent me flowers before and I doubt He ever will again. it was a one off thing for a one off day and it made it just that much more special to us.

The rest of it passed in a whirl of activity, hair, makeup, jewellery, lost socks, misplaced earrings and mixed up shoes. The only minor panic happened when the baby white roses meant for the groomsmen's lapels turned up at Mum's with the bouquets. This was taken care of with a couple of quick phone calls. Mac's Dad said he would come and pick them up.

When he arrived I had just walked out of the bedroom with my wedding dress on. Everything was done except my shoes and the veil. The photographer was there to get some shots of my parents and me before the big event so I was almost ready even though there was still quite a while to go. I grinned at Mac's Dad when I saw him standing there and His Dad looked at me and just said "wow". I smiled at the compliment.

"You can't tell Mac anything about how I look." I said to him.
"Oh Sarah." He said. "I wouldn't spoil this, not for either of you." On impulse I stood on tiptoe and kissed Mac's Dad on the cheek. He looked dazed for just a second, in exactly the same way Mac sometimes does when I do that to Him. "My son is a very lucky man," he said and I know that right then I was shining. Mac's Dad never says anything he doesn't mean.

So then it was photographs in the garden with Mum and with Dad and on my own and with my sister and then some of the flower girl and page boy and the bridesmaids and any and all combinations you can think off. We still were in the cars right on time. I was two minutes early at the church.

There were a couple more photos taken of my Dad offering His hand as I got out of the car and we went inside and were led into a room to wait until everyone had taken their seats. My dress was fussed over, the train adjusted just right. The veil was turned over my face. The page boy and flower girl were stood side by side and the girls all lined up in order behind them. Dad and I stood last.

The doors finally opened and we all took a step forward. Then another and another and one more. Suddenly it was just Dad and I standing there ready to step out.

"Sarah" Dad said, "next time we talk you will be Mac's wife, but you will always be my girl."
"I love you, Dad." I whispered, suddenly feeling so very small.
He squeezed my arm. "Goodbye Sarah Broden." He said. My eyes filled up with tears.

Everyone was on their feet, looking back at us.

"Let's go." Dad said.

And we stepped out into the aisle.

Posted by Sarah McBroden at 12:55 pm

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